At Monday night’s Totally JK, Noah and I started the show with a bit that involved me acting out the lyrics to a new R. Kelly “song” called “Real Talk.” (To thunderous applause, obvz.)

Sadly, we did not tape the show and, therefore, there is no video of this monumental performance.

There are, however, a bunch of youtubes of black dudes doing the exact same thing for their webcams.

I have way more influence than even I realize.

(Clearly, the last one is the best. But the fourth video is by a guy named “blackpizza12,” which is what I now plan on naming my firstborn child, boy or girl.)