Today I am introducing a new segment to my blog called “U got P.L.I.P.P.S.”
P.L.I.P.P.S., for those of you who don’t already know, is a disease I made up. It’s a lot like A.I.D.S. and cancer, only worse. You can only get P.L.I.P.P.S. if you are a huge, obnoxious douche-bag who is famous for no reason and I hate you.Â
(Also, IÂ have no idea what it’s an acronym for.)
I am currently the only person in the world qualified to diagnose PLIPPS. But, being the good Samaritan I am, I will occasionally use my blog as a platform to identify those inflicted with PLIPPS as a matter of public safety.
Hopefully, over time, others will be able to diagnose PLIPPS for themselves. And in turn, more people will be diagnosed with, and hopefully die of, PLIPPS.
So here goes…
The first person to be publicly outed with PLIPPS is none other than TV’s Brody Jenner.
I was watching MTV Cribs this weekend, and this motherfucker was on giving a tour of his scenic $24,000,000 Malibu house.
Only, it wasn’t really his house…it was his parent’s house. Only, it wasn’t really his parent’s house, it was his stepdad’s house. Only, it wasn’t really his stepdad’s house, it was his mom’s house, which she got via a divorce settlement from his stepdad.
Did you follow that? This dude was on national TV, without any shame, parading around an amazing house that he gets to live in solely because his mom is an evil, money-grubbing cunt.
If you don’t think that alone deserves a slow, painful death from PLIPPS, just look at Brody Jenner’s wikipedia page and tell me you don’t want him dead.
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 Brody Jenner (born August 21, 1983), a reality television celebrity and model, is the younger son of Olympic decathlon champion Bruce Jenner and actress Linda Thompson.
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He is a stepson of songwriter David Foster and a stepbrother of Kim Kardashian.
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 Jenner dated actress Kristin Cavallari of Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County for about one year.
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Weeks after his break up with Cavallari, in August 2006, he began seeing longtime friend, Nicole Richie.
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Multiple internet gossip columns, and Richie herself through her MySpace blog, have suggested that the relationship between Jenner and Richie was staged for publicity purposes.
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Most recently, Jenner has been romantically linked to Haylie Duff.
I just barfed on my keyboard. No joke. By the way, I just decided that all the people on his wikipedia have PLIPPS too, even the person who spent the time writing it.
