As I was walking to Starbucks this morning, listening to my Apple iPhone and catching up on all my National Public Radio podcasts (there’s no need to judge me because I just barfed all over myself for you), I came across Talk of the Nation’s recent interview with world-renowned photographer Howard Bingham. I’m sad to say this interview might be one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard in my life.

The reason I’m sad to say this is because…well…I can’t really tell if Howard Bingham is retarded or not. (I really hope, for the sake of me not being the worst person ever, that he’s not.) I assume he’s not retarded, because being good at photography necessitates a lot complex thought, what with apertures, f-stops, depth of field and all that stuff. But, man. Listening to that guy talk, it really sounds like they’re interviewing someone who, if not retarded, is definitely on the verge of becoming retarded.

Anyway, if you have a little spare time today, I highly recommend listening to the entire 17-minute interview. Because it’s great. But, just to get you started, here’s a little amuse douche:

Eek! That shit is like Howard Stern for people with PhD’s.

By the way, that clip was taken right after the host, Lynn Neary, introduced Howard as the “Forrest Gump of photographic journalism.” How are you not supposed to assume that someone is retarded when he’s introduced as the Forrest Gump of anything?

This is my favorite moment of the interview:

Lynn Neary: Did you love it right away? Did you find out that you loved it right away?

Howard Bingham: It was.

It should also be noted that I’m sorry. (But only half as much as the 9-11 mime. Perhaps even less.)

Look, before you watch this video, just know in advance that I’m sorry.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.