As many of you (my fans) might imagine, having and maintaining an important and popular weblog such as joemande.com can sometimes feel like a full time job. Every morning, before I watch TV and read the Drudge Report for inspiration, I have to log on to my website and sift through literally thousands of reader comments. I do this despite the fact I could totally get a robot do it for me. Easily. But I don’t; I insist on doing it myself. I believe the major reason I emerged as a true comedic force in New York City in 2007 was because my fans (who are the BEST, by the way) were able to sense my influence, and personally connect with me as a genius, as they read and responded to my website.

Sadly, I’ve come to suspect that many of my “readers” are frauds. Phonies. A bunch of fake-ass posers. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little devastated by this realization.

You may have to look closely, but see if you can tell what’s wrong with the comments I got this morning:

That’s right. Not only are they needlessly repetitive, but they also all have the same IP Address! Can you believe that? Here I am thinking I’m making this personal connection with a slew of new fans–people like Black Pussy Black Lesbian Porn Fat Black Pussy and Anal Sex Anal Bleaching Black Anal–only to discover that they’re all probably written by the same person. A very fat lesbian with a beautifully bleached black ass.

I’m worried that a few of my more dedicated commenters–people like: Big Asian Lactating Tit Boobs, super bowl party decorations, Granny MILF Mom and Son Sex, Impressive grease broadway tickets, and Gay Horse Fuck, might all be pretenders as well. I pray that my worries are eventually proven to be in vain, but let’s just say I’m not optimistic.

Sometimes I wish all of my fans could act like antonio banderas biography? Talk about a classy commenter.

Textbook form: short, positive, complimentary. You can really tell that that book loves reading my blog, not to mention enjoyes hit films.

Yesterday morning, I went through the trouble of uploading the lesbian fox routine from the So You Think You Can Dance finale onto youtube. I did this because I felt it was important for those who missed it to see the most gaytarded thing ever made. In fact, I even edited it down a little–CUT THE FAT OUT–to streamline the gaytarded nature of the video and make it more enjoyable (see: less enjoyable) for the viewing public. And for what?

I’m sad to say that this stupid fucking clip is quickly becoming my most widely viewed online video. As of this morning, it’s gotten almost 3000 hits and already has garnered over 20 viewer comments. The comments, by the way, are overwhelmingly positive and completely void of irony.

The world is a cold, miserable, stupid place and youtube is the cause of it.

Click below to read my fave comments so far:

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